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A love letter and a suicide note on Tue Sep 07, 2010 10:30 am
Faulter
Hardcore Grandmaster
A love letter and a suicide note
Six days ago I wrote a love letter and a suicide note.
In the letter in confessed my love to my woman, my parents and friends
Those who I have loved and been loved by.
Each of them got a special mention
To each of them I said a special thank you and commended them on how they guided me
Guiding on paths of love, pain, admiration, hate and self destruction
Those who owned my heart for parts of my life, those how tried and failed, all of them I wrote a piece for.
For Some more than others my anger and wrath flowed like endless waterfalls,
For some more than others my love was a constant gentle breeze.
After a bottle and a couple of lines I wrote my suicide note
Hell if I knew what I was writing, but the words manifested themselves on the paper,
Effortlessly I could describe why my life should end, and at that stage I had no doubt it would end.
The previous attempts were hidden and labelled adrenaline sports, though every time I jumped I wished the line would snap, a shark would eat me or that that brick wall would jump in my way.
I wrote them both and sealed them in envelops, but never labelled them.
Not sure yet why I didn’t label them, just know I didn’t.
Finally the liquor took its toll and I passed out.
Waking up I was unsure of which of the two envelopes I should burn,
Before I could do anything my house was overrun by the friends and family I wrote about
They had no idea what I had written and very blind to the torment I had endured the night before
How could they have known, I can hide myself so well.
Anyways the day went off great, they laughed and we talked, reminisced about old times.
Then they left and so my joy, as the uncertainty of which letter to send returned to my thoughts.
Sitting down with a bottle, a razor and a gun I decided to read both, in the hope rereading my words would show me the path.
As I burnt the last of the two, the truth dawned and hit me like a ton of bricks.
Word for word, they were both the same
Faulter
Six days ago I wrote a love letter and a suicide note.
In the letter in confessed my love to my woman, my parents and friends
Those who I have loved and been loved by.
Each of them got a special mention
To each of them I said a special thank you and commended them on how they guided me
Guiding on paths of love, pain, admiration, hate and self destruction
Those who owned my heart for parts of my life, those how tried and failed, all of them I wrote a piece for.
For Some more than others my anger and wrath flowed like endless waterfalls,
For some more than others my love was a constant gentle breeze.
After a bottle and a couple of lines I wrote my suicide note
Hell if I knew what I was writing, but the words manifested themselves on the paper,
Effortlessly I could describe why my life should end, and at that stage I had no doubt it would end.
The previous attempts were hidden and labelled adrenaline sports, though every time I jumped I wished the line would snap, a shark would eat me or that that brick wall would jump in my way.
I wrote them both and sealed them in envelops, but never labelled them.
Not sure yet why I didn’t label them, just know I didn’t.
Finally the liquor took its toll and I passed out.
Waking up I was unsure of which of the two envelopes I should burn,
Before I could do anything my house was overrun by the friends and family I wrote about
They had no idea what I had written and very blind to the torment I had endured the night before
How could they have known, I can hide myself so well.
Anyways the day went off great, they laughed and we talked, reminisced about old times.
Then they left and so my joy, as the uncertainty of which letter to send returned to my thoughts.
Sitting down with a bottle, a razor and a gun I decided to read both, in the hope rereading my words would show me the path.
As I burnt the last of the two, the truth dawned and hit me like a ton of bricks.
Word for word, they were both the same
Faulter
